Concerning Childbirth

I've been meaning to write this down for a long time. My motivation?
Perhaps to have a reminder, or a self-note, should I happen to be with
a baby again. I hope this writing can be of use, too, for others.
During both times of my pregnancy (in 2000 and 2003), I joined a class
called Safe Natural Birth, or Active Birth.
The term 'active' is used since Lillith Türk, our instructor, believes
that mothers should actively be involved in a birthing process. I agree
with this, especially considering unpleasant experiences of my friends
and acquaintances: how doctors preferred to give them a c-section (no
working on odd hours), how doctors and nurses bossed them around during
the delivery ("You should lay flat on your back so the doctor can see better!" - the doctor?! who is giving birth here?!), and other stories
where mothers-to-be were treated like cattle.



Women have been losing control over their own delivery since long ago, and
I agree that we should rediscover the natural way of giving birth;
women should gain their confidence back in this matter. I'm not against
improvement in medical technology and treatment, of course, since they
indeed save lives and are very useful in complicated conditions. So if
you are healthy, you live clean (no smoke, no drugs), your pregnancy
goes well and your baby-in-tummy is also healthy, you can actually
enjoy the most-dreaded delivery moments very much.



I'm glad that I gave birth in a country where 'home delivery' is
encouraged (although available, hospital delivery is optional). Here
are some points that I summarized from the Active Birth class, which
have helped me through the delivery:



1. Delivery pains are perhaps
the most dreadful thing any woman can expect. But this fear of pain can
be reduced if we know why the pain is there, and what it's good for.

Contraction pain: to open the passage way and to push the baby out

Delivery pain: it's the climax, and will be over before you know it.
Nothing beats the feeling of holding your new-born in your
arms.

Post-natal pain: similar to contraction pain, but this time its
purpose is to shrink the womb. Everytime the pain came, I thought, "Ah - another step towards my normal-size belly!". By the way, I felt this post-natal pain at the 2nd birth; didn't feel it at the first, but it's different for everybody.



Contraction pain causes discomfort not only to the mother, but to the
baby as well. The discomfort makes the baby push itself out of the womb (did
you know that babies also actively take part in their own birthings?),
and signals the mother of when to help pushing the baby out. The tips
are:

• Everytime the pain comes, don't think about how painful it is, or
  how long it has been. Instead, think about how far you've gone, or how
  good and brave you've been.


• When the pain comes, don't panic. Being panic only tightens your
  (already-stretched) muscles, therefore causing more pain. Relaxing (not
  easy, I know) will loosen up your muscle and might help reducing the
  pain. So: don't fight it, but work with it. It would be easier for
  those who has a composure, therefore can fully control their breathing.

The 'frog' position, to relax.



2. Be strong on the legs,
because you should be able to support
yourself. During contractions, it helps to walk around, or urinate
(bend as far as you can, to squeeze the bladder empty), or (my
favourite position) be on all four (or supported by pillows, called the
'frog' position). During
delivery, when you choose not to lay on your back, you'll need your
legs
to squat, or support you on all four, if you wish. Make yourself round
(bend a bit, or 'sit' a bit upright); in this shape, the baby would
slip out easier. Afterwards, and this is important, you'll need to
urinate often, right away, in order to shrink your womb. I'll never
forget how my midwives (and later, maternity nurses) liked to 'nag' me
a lot to go empty my bladder.





An exercise to strengthen your legs



3. Mind your posture. Most back
aches are caused by our own habit of sitting, walking and standing
sloppily. Keep the upper part of your body erect, don't hunch or lean
to the sides when sitting. You don't have to walk like a model, but
walk gracefully by placing the ball of your foot first before the rest,
one after another, pull your shoulder back, point your chin forward. This is useful especially when your gravity point
has changed, due to your growing belly: you'll learn to balance
yourself nicely. It also helps reducing back pain, especially at the
lower back, whose muscles also support the growing tummy. If you are
concious of your posture during pregnancy, believe me, after giving
birth you'll look better than ever!







Each person has different body and characteristics, of course, so don't
be afraid to find ways that are most convenient for yourself. The most important thing is learning to listen to your body. I've
written my birthing experience for our first and second babies (in Indonesian), and made graphic 'reports' for both: a 9-month diary and another 9-month diary



Images: website illustrations for Active Health Center and from my sketchbook-diary (a couple of pregnancy exercises)