He is happy where he is right now

Too late. That's what came to mind right after I heard the news. I was
way too late, I could have done what I meant to do long ago, but never
got to do it. Now I won't be able to make up for anything, for I was
too late.



Yesterday afternoon was a doctoral public defense for a friend of mine,
Gembong, in Eindhoven. I came to give him support, also to see if I
could meet some friends whom I met rarely since I moved away from
Eindhoven. I was right: in the auditorium (where the public defense was
held), I saw familiar faces. During the break (between the defense and
the doctoral degree declaration), a woman smiled widely and called my
name. I broke to a sort of disbelieved smile and uttered, "Diane!"



Memories from my life in
Eindhoven flashed quickly in my mind as soon as I saw her. Diane, an
Italian American, and Izaac, her Indonesian husband, were among the
most helpful and friendly persons I've ever met. I was introduced to
her by a flatmate of mine, Mignon (a Korean girl), once I told her that
I was looking for a protestant church I can go to. So one Sunday
morning, Izaac and Diane picked me up from my apartment and we drove
together to the International Baptist Church. They did this to make
sure I know the way, so I could go by myself (by bike) next time.

Shortly later, I found out that
this couple has been dedicating lots of their time and energy to take
care of international students in Eindhoven. They let their house
functioned as a kind of 'community center' where youths from any
nationality, culture and religion, could meet, talk, eat, sing, play,
and basically gather. Most international students in Eindhoven would
have heard about 4U2 (International Student Group Eindhoven) as well as about Izaac and Diane (here's an article about them at Cursor,
weekly paper of TU/e). This couple has always been helpful in any way,
from finding a lodging to physically helping someone packing and
moving. From having fun and listening to petty problems, to consoling
serious matters. In the later year of my study, I hung out with this
community quite often, enjoying each other's company and feeling the
luxury of having so many brothers and sisters.

When it was time for me to move
to Amsterdam, I promised I would visit them. When I gave birth to our
son, I promised again I would bring along our baby to meet them, but I
never did. When I gave birth to our daughter, I made a similar promise,
which I also didn't fulfill. I kept thinking, I live not too far anyway
and I could always make time one day - until it's too late.



Almost automatically, after I called out, "Diane!", I right away asked,
cheerfully, "Where's Izaac?". Diane said quietly, "He passed away". I
was stunned and didn't know what to say. She continued, "It was a
couple of months ago. I know I should have told you, but... Well it
went so quickly, it was a heart attack. He went to sleep and never woke
up anymore". I was on the verge of tears, but seeing Diane looking so
calm and brave, all I could do was saying, "He is happy where he is
right now".



Afterwards, we couldn't go deeply over the fact that Izaac is no longer
with us, due to the happy occasion that Gembong succeeded in his
defense and acquired his doctoral degree (which wasn't easy, since he,
too, has been through a turmoil during the completion of his
dissertation). Later, Gembong told me that one day before passing away,
Izaac had helped him and his family during the hustle and bustle of
sudden packing and moving back to Indonesia. Lifting boxes, loading his
car, driving around, and everything he used to do for anyone in that
state. The next day, he was gone.



Later at night, when everything was already quiet and everyone asleep,
I finally had time to ponder about Izaac and Diane. What they have done
to make us, foreign students, feel at home and be a big family in
Eindhoven. How I should have fulfilled my promises and brought my kids
to see them. Rest well, Izaac; I know you'll always look after us,
wherever you are. I finally fell asleep, ignoring the dampness on my
pillow.





Image: from the 4U2 website